top of page

The old man at the cashier 

I still remember the smell that was in the air that morning: a blend of freshness of apple pie, strawberries, and wild flowers. It was a hot summer morning when the sun has casted its hidden rays after a glamorous night. Nothing could stop the golden rays from penetrating through the windows. Outside, little baby birds sang their morning routine inside their tiny hidden nest. My body was sore from sitting in the car the previous day. My father couldn’t drive through the night on our moving trip from Chicago to Charlotte, so we had to stop at a nearby hotel to rest in a small town east of Tennessee.

I had never been to this place, and I don’t think many people do. It was in the middle of the mountains and the hotel looked old. At first, my father was hesitant to stay here, but it was the only nearby hotel. The town looked old and unsettling at night. However, it was the complete opposite the following morning. Looking down from the car window, every corner of this town was striking. The scenery of the green houses indicated endless beauty. They were all covered with branching plants.

My sister and I decided to go out and buy groceries from a nearby store in this small town. As my sister and I entered the store, we noticed how packed it was. My stomach grumbled at the smell of the freshly baked bread. When I was loading the bread into my shopping cart, I felt a feeling of unease settle on my shoulders. The sound of my sister talking right beside me was the only sound that I could hear. I brushed it off my mind quickly and I decided to load the rest of the bread in the cart. Right when I turned around, I noticed that almost everyone in the little store were not shopping. Instead, they were staring at us. They were staring at the flowered scarves that covered our heads. It was something I have never experienced before. Suddenly, my head felt heavy and huge. Everyone looked confused and amazed at me and my sister. It seemed as though we were aliens. It felt like a slow-motion horror movie. I decided to ignore the stares by continuing my shopping and soon enough everyone was back at their previous routine. I felt scared and amused at the same time. I was used to being stared at all the time, but this was to another level.

 At crawling speed, I approached the checkout and before I could leave, there was an old man sitting there that had a gray beard which covered half of his face. He also had bright blue eyes.  The old man at the cashier said hello and asked if we found everything that we needed. I told him that we did and thanked him. Everyone gathered around to listen, in a distance. However, the disturbing stares that I got made me uncomfortable. He welcomed my visit to the town ignoring the glances from the people behind me. Looking straight into his eyes, I could tell that he wanted to ask me something- probably about my head scarf or “Hijab”. And, right when I was loading the groceries into the cart, he finally poured out the question that had caused the puzzled look on his face. “You remind me of my granddaughter,” he finally said. “It’s called a hijab, a head scarf,” I replied without a second to spare. Right after I realized his comment, my head started spinning, and my face turned red. My sister pinched me on the back of my shoulder and gave me the “are you stupid?” look on her face.  My hands started to sweat as I stared at the old man. “Oh, thank you, I guess.” “You are welcome,” the old man said with a crooked smile on his face. “Are you visiting someone here or are you just passing by?” he asked. “We are just passing by,” my sister replied. Right when we said our goodbyes, the old man called out and handed us something from an old drawer that was just beneath the cashier. My sister took it from him, hesitant.  It was a small ceramics plate that had the word confidence on it and a star besides it. I looked at the old man, then at the yellow plate a couple of times and realized how I misjudged this old man. After my sister and I left, I was ashamed for totally assuming that the old man was just like all the other people in the store.

 

The old man’s generosity and kindness empowered me. The plate he gave me made me confident. It gave me hope. Furthermore, looking back at this moment, I noticed that it is the hijab (scarf) that shaped my identity. It is not something that is just wrapped around my head, but it is something that defines me. It has become something that preserves my modesty and faith. The warp, fold, and click have turned into my daily routine. It has become part of me. The hijab has changed the way I look into the world and the way some people view me. Judging this old man and thinking that he was only concerned about my hijab has changed my perception about people. I always thought that people would judge a person based on their looks or what they are wearing, but this old man has taught me to always think the best of people. I wear the hijab while traveling, working, and studying. I make mistakes and I am far from perfect. I always think that when people may not always understand me, God knows what is in my heart. Sometimes, for me, the fearful looks and the strange stares are unimportant. Wearing a head scarf or dressing modestly is not simply just veiling myself, it is a way of behaving and thinking, accepting myself for who I am. The old man that was at the cashier gave a plate that had confidence on it to make me feel secure and it was a way of welcoming me and my sister to this town. I will remember this old man not because I totally misjudged him, but because he changed my opinion about how people view my hijab.  Sometimes, a simple act of kindness can impact a person in a profound way.

 

bottom of page